Once again, unsurprisingly, its been a while. Finals came and went, the numerous tick boxes of final year checked and the days of placement crossed off the calendar. All in the hopes that you get to hear those words “You did it!”
In just over a week I graduate with the title ‘Dr‘ – stand with all my colleagues and say the Hippocratic Oath. I cannot believe that day is almost here; more so I cannot believe that only two days after I cross that stage in a cap and gown, I’ll venture onto the wards and say “Hi my name is Rebecca, I’m one of the doctors on the team looking after you.” It astounds me, something I’d convinced myself might never happen. At the moment I’m in a weird limbo, people I love call me ‘doctor’ a proud exclamation, congratulating me on finally making it through; forms I fill in for bills, banks etc ask for my title and I wonder what I should put… I’m not a doctor yet. Yes, the hoops have all been jumped and the exams have been passed with graduation just around the corner… but my registration doesn’t start yet. It feels weird to refer to myself as a doctor, to agree to the title when I haven’t started work yet. It feels weird to suddenly go from ‘Miss…’ to ‘Dr…’ leaving the title I’ve had for the last 25 years on the shelf! Hopefully as the months continue it’ll feel less odd.
But first I need to make the move – I’m leaving the comforts of home, to disappear across the border into a big city. It terrifies me, leaving the people I love my friends and family; to a system I have no experience in, in a hospital I have never set foot it. It’s scary. But it’s also exciting – I get to move to a new city with my other half and start doing the job I have longed to do. It will be worth it, and everyone will be in the same position as I… we hopefully we’ll all stick together and support each other through. Until then – I’m packing, sorting, filling out forms, inductions and generally fumbling through; this ‘holiday’ time has been full of ‘to-dos’ and I cant wait for a few days to just relax before the chaos ensues.
I promise I won’t leave it so long this time. Speak to you soon.